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Meet Pearlette Ramos of Attorney Well Being Group in Avondale

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Today we’d like to introduce you to Pearlette J. Ramos.

Pearlette, before we jump into specific questions about your business, please give us some details about you and your story.
For more than 30 years, I have been committed to empowering women to live extraordinary lives. Today, I help busy professionals realize their goals and live a more purposeful, vibrant and balanced life through supportive coaching, writing, motivational speaking, and leading travel adventures. My passion is in helping women find their voice and discover who they are and what they want! It’s something I strove to conquer in my own life.

My story, while unique to me, can also be told by millions of other women who have confronted significant obstacles in their lives. 

Originally from Youngstown, Ohio, I overcame poverty, abuse, teenage motherhood, dropping out of high school, the death of a child, and other adverse traumatic experiences to become a respected lawyer and world traveler who lives life, authentically, on her terms.

My inspiration comes from a belief that every person is a co-creator with Universal Consciousness (an underlying essence of being or energy that exists in all things), imbued with resilience and the potential to manifest their dreams regardless of life’s obstacles. A healthy mindset, grounded in faith and love, can turn any struggle into triumph. 

I was raised in a home riddled with dysfunction. Not only was there abuse, but growing up in poverty was exacerbated by alcoholism and mental illness. It didn’t help that my stepfather was illiterate and my mother dropped out of high school in the 9th grade. There was so much violence in our home. By the time I was 15 years old, I decided to leave. Initially, I moved in with my brother, his wife and their four young children, but I didn’t stay long. My boyfriend, who was 19 years old at the time, asked for my hand in marriage. Not realizing I could say “no,” I responded with an absolute “yes.”

Even though I was living apart from my parents, I was not emancipated. As a result, I needed my mother’s permission to tie the knot. I sat my mother down at her kitchen table and explained my intent to get married. “I won’t blame you if it doesn’t work out,” I told her. After promising my mother I would go to college and make something of my life, she gave me her permission to marry. Within days I was at the local library researching to find out which state would allow a 15-year-old girl to get married. I soon learned Missouri was the place to go. Using the library’s typewriter, I drafted my first legal-type document, a parental consent form. I presented the form to my mom, assisted her with getting it notarized, and took off for Missouri where my fiancé just happened to be completing basic training at the Fort Leonard Wood Army base in the Missouri Ozarks. 

We were married on November 14, 1984.

Within two months of saying “I do,” I learned I was pregnant. The news devastated me. Even though I was married, I was ashamed. I had dreamed of becoming the first person in my family to graduate from college and make a better life for myself. Getting pregnant was the last thing I wanted. Too embarrassed to attend high school, I became a high school drop-out. By this time, my husband had been transferred to Fort Bragg in North Carolina. I joined him and we settled into our first home together in Spring Lake, a small town about six miles from the military base. I soon learned about educational opportunities, including the General Education Diploma (GED) preparation, available to military families. I signed up to take the test. Shortly after turning 16 years old, I took and passed the GED exam. A few months later, on July 23, 1985, my daughter, Chavi Elle, was born.
 
My baby lived for four short months. She died suddenly of acute bronchial pneumonia. Again, I was devastated. This time, my sorrow was coupled with heartbreak. The sudden loss of my child, when I was a child myself, still ranks as my most traumatic life experience. I had no frame of reference how to cope with the pain I felt. For years I blamed myself for her death, believing I should have done something – anything – to prevent her sickness from progressing. It took me many years and, ultimately a healing ceremony, to process the grief so I could begin to let go of the pain.

After burying my daughter, I enrolled in college. Four years later, I graduated with a bachelor’s degree, at age 20. While attending college, I gave birth to my second daughter. Her first birthday was right before my college graduation ceremony. 

During the early years of my career, I worked several jobs, sometimes three at a time, just to make ends meet. Many of the positions – including serving as a rape crisis counselor as well as helping women get off public assistance – allowed me to help uplift women. I also worked in various domestic violence shelters where I advocated for women and children who had experienced violence and abuse. These experiences ignited a fire within me to change the laws that disproportionately impacted women and people of color. I decided to go to law school, and to also get a divorce. In 1991, I applied for law school and was accepted. I also petitioned for my divorce, representing myself Pro-se. By August 1992, I had moved with my daughter to Cleveland, Ohio, where I began my studies, as a single parent, at Case Western Reserve University School of Law. I graduated three years later and moved with my daughter to Michigan, where I began my legal career. I was 26 years old.

While in Michigan, I started to explore my various interests and talents. In addition to working as a commercial litigator, I became a business owner, professor, and real estate investor. I got involved in Detroit politics and started advocating for social issues that were important to me. I also remarried and gave birth to my third daughter. I felt successful in most of the ways that mattered to everyone around me. I was a professional woman, married to another lawyer. We took great vacations, had adequate savings, lived in a big beautiful house and I drove a Benz. I had honored my promise to my mother and had checked off all the “success” boxes; yet, my life did not feel deeply satisfying. It was during this time that I received “the call” to my purpose. My inner voice of intuition, was pulling me towards something else: a deeper connection and relationship with my authentic self.

After anguishing with discontent for several years, I enrolled in a few personal development and leadership programs and hired a life coach. Eventually, I became a coach through the Co-Active Training Institute. Then, in 2006, I found the courage to walk away from practicing law and the life I had spent decades creating. I moved to Arizona in 2007, and embarked on another journey – to obtain my doctorate in psychology, which I earned in 2012 from Saybrook University in Pasadena, California.
 
Looking back over my life, I can see how I spent the first part of my journey striving to overcome the life I was born into. The quest for more was insatiable; however, no matter what or how much I acquired, it was never enough. Mark Nepo in his book, The Book of Awakening, said it this way:
 
“We do ourselves a great disservice by judging where we are in comparison to some final destination. This is one of the pains of aspiring to become something: the stage of development we are in is always seen against the imagined landscape of what we are striving for. So, where we are—though closer all the time—is never quite enough.”

During the past 20 years, I have cultivated a relationship with the adventurous spirit I have always had within me. Travel is one of the mediums I have used to transform my life. I am an adventurist, at heart, and my passion for exploration has led me to scuba dive at the Great Barrier Reef in Australia, parasail in Hawaii, travel down zip lines in the Alaskan wilderness, skydive out of a plane in Michigan, and snowshoe in the Antarctic region.  I feel most alive and free in nature!

What do you feel most helped you get from where you started to where you are today?
How does a poor black girl from Youngstown, Ohio grow up to overcome obstacles and live a life she loves? Faith. Trust. Hope. Courage. Optimism. And, belief. The most important thing that got me through my darkest hours was my connection to my inner source, or guide. My intuition directed me towards my center and encouraged me to have faith. No matter how dire my life situation, I had hope that everything would be okay. My mindset, my belief in who I AM—not what I do or where I was in life—helped guide me out of every difficult situation I have faced. I didn’t always believe it would be easy; however, I always believed it was possible. And, I acted in accordance with my beliefs.

Please tell us about your business.
The primary aim of my business is to help women consciously create authentic and meaningful lives they love where they manifest their dreams and fulfill their purpose! So many of us are in the “rat-race of life,” where we seek material pursuits, yet we lack a deep connection to ourselves and why we are on this planet. Despite the quest to achieve “success,” many of us are awakening to an inner call to something more, something deeper than a bigger house and bank account. The call is to awaken to growing, transforming and actualizing your potential. Claiming your own authenticity in a world that expects you to conform to societal norms even when they are unhealthy or unfulfilling for you. Women healing first themselves, and then other women, will create a powerful sisterhood that will be used to transform the world—one woman at a time. That’s my vision for the future: a world redesigned by warrior women.

In addition to being a motivational speaker and author, I guide transformational journeys around the world, facilitate women’s empowerment workshops, and coach others toward living life with passion and purpose, from a place of authenticity. Having visited more than 60 countries and each of the seven continents, I love navigating the planet alongside other women. In 2019 I led local and national trips as well as a trek to Italy and Monaco. In 2020, I will lead an adventurous group of 40+ year old women who are headed to Tanzania to hike Mt. Kilimanjaro, go on safari in the Serengeti and lounge on Zanzibar’s beaches.

My book, The Travel Coach & Journal ($14.99, Amazon), is a motivational coach, planner and travel guide – all in one! Part one includes reflections and affirmations that coach you to explore yourself and the world simultaneously. Probing questions and inspiring exercise help you take a deeper dive into your inner experience while you visit the sites and scenery around you! Part two has a 21-day journal that aids you in planning and memorializing your trip. Whether you are traveling solo, with friends, or part of an organized group, you can create a unique travel experience by being a conscious explorer on your next journey.

Inspiring and empowering women to navigate life, and find their True North, is part of my calling. I’m ecstatic to be a part of another person’s journey.

Any shout-outs? Who else deserves credit in this story – who has played a meaningful role?
Yes, several people have helped me along my journey. My brother, Lee, gave me shelter and respite when I was desperate for a safe haven. I have had a cadre of women–Kelly, Tammy, Akoswa, Tresa, Joy, Robin, Colete, Terry, Raj, and Tyra–who have been my champions throughout the years. They lift me up, encourage me to evolve and hold my hand when I stumble.  One extraordinary man, Arthur, has been a rock of support in my life—and for that I am eternally grateful.
 
Finally, I would be remiss if I didn’t mention the first woman who mentored me, my mother, Janie. Although she departed this earth on December 29, 2018, she was a constant voice of unwavering support and genuine kindness; she taught me how to love

Pricing:

  • The Travel Coach & Journal, $14.99 (Amazon)

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